The average person experiences doubt in one form or another at least 15 minutes a day. In fact, feeling doubt about ourselves is so common; we often don’t even notice it when it happens. For some of us, the self-doubt can be especially debilitating and have a negative impact on our daily lives. But there are steps you can take to overcome this behavior and eliminate self-doubt from your life forever!
If you’ve ever struggled with feelings of inadequacy, or been unable to achieve something that was important to you because of those nagging doubts in the back of your mind, then these 3 simple steps can help says Peter DeCaprio.
Self-doubt shows up as an inner voice that makes snarky remarks about our abilities or personality. Examples include:
- You’re not good enough to do this.
- What makes you think you can handle this?
- Everyone else knows more than you do.
These remarks often pop up when we are struggling, hoping to convince us that we should give up and run back to where it’s safe and comfortable.
- The first step to eliminating self-doubt is awareness of the situation, just noticing when those thoughts arise and labeling them as such. When you notice your inner voice talking down to you, recognize that it’s just a thought passing through your brain—don’t take it personally! Instead of scolding yourself for having self-doubts, simply acknowledge it: “Oh, look… here comes the self-doubt.”
- The next step is to remind yourself that your feelings are NOT an accurate predictor of the outcome. If you’ve ever felt doubt before then you know that it can be strong enough to convince us that we will fail or fall short of our goals. The trick here is to remember that just because you feel something strongly, doesn’t mean it’s true—your feelings don’t necessarily reflect reality accurately. What matters is what actually happens! Let’s say for example, you’re dreading a job interview and begin wondering if maybe they won’t like YOU as much as other candidates…. Your inner voice may start its usual doom and gloom remarks: “You’ll do terrible… You always get so nervous in interviews… They probably won’t even hire you….”
Here’s the critical part you need to remember: Just because YOU feel nervous doesn’t mean that they will feel the same way! Your feelings are not an accurate predictor of how this other person is thinking or feeling. So, don’t let your fear speak for the interviewer! Instead of letting your self-doubt run wild, remind yourself that there is no evidence behind your fears and keep your focus on preparing yourself as best as possible. Remember, what matters is what happens during the interview—not what goes on inside YOUR head.
- The final step after practicing awareness and reminding yourself is to push through the doubt and take action anyway. Even when we try to convince ourselves that our feelings don’t matter, we can’t deny that self-doubt feels bad. Although our inner dialogue usually doesn’t have much effect on what actually happens, pushing through feelings of doubt can be challenging sometimes.
Try to focus on the fact that moving forward in spite of your fears is a huge accomplishment! It’s likely that many people in your same situation would not be able to push through the self-doubt and accomplish their goals because they are stuck in negative loop churning out crippling thoughts. Remind yourself that just because you feel insecure about something, it doesn’t mean you aren’t good enough or qualified enough—you’ve just got to keep showing up anyway!
Conclusion:
Self-doubt is a necessary part of the human experience because it stops us from jumping into something before we are ready or fully committed—it helps us avoid things that might be too hard, painful, or overwhelming. But taken to an extreme, self-doubts can prevent you from taking action and hold you back from moving towards your greatest potential!
Peter DeCaprio pointed that if you’ve been struggling with self-doubt lately then these simple steps may help: become aware of when those thoughts arise, remind yourself that they’re just feelings and not facts about the outcome of an event/situation, and finally remember to push through them anyway as you take action despite your fears! Once you’ve mastered this new way of dealing with self-doubt, you’ll be able to focus on the task at hand with greater clarity and confidence!